OMG, friend, narinig mo na
ba ang latest? Halika, pabasa ko sa’yo, dali! Wait, nasa’n na nga ba ‘yung
tabloid? Ayan, there, oh! “Beki, nanggigil; ari ni totoy, muntik maputol”. WTF,
right?
But it gets better! You
know, the victim pala is our neighbor! That’s right! ‘Yung nakatira d’yan sa
tapat! Infer, ang guwapo nu’ng batang ‘yun, ha? Pucha, dose pa lang pala. I’ve
been eyeing him from afar kasi ang tangkad, eh. At ang pogi talaga ni kuya! But
WTF, muntik na daw maputol ang birdie niya. Deformed na kaya ‘yun ngayon?
How did I know? Hello, may
pakpak ang balita, may tenga ako! Hahaha. Eh, di siyempre, si Aling Loleng of
the friendly neighborhood sari-sari store ang nag-tsismis! Nagkuwento daw ‘yung
nanay ni Patrick bago nila dalhin sa ospital ‘yung bata. Bumili daw kasi ng
yelo ‘yung nanay para sa nag-kulay talong na birdie ni kuya. Nakakaloka, di ba?
Alam mo, duda nga ako sa
rape kuwento, eh. Kasi he’s so big kaya! I mean, how big would the ateh be to
overpower him and take off his pants, di ba? And while the deed is happening,
can’t he escape? Eh, di sana pinalo niya sa ulo si ateh while she’s sucking him
off, di ba? I’m thinking maybe he enjoyed it, ‘no? Whatchathink? Does your
birdie, like, stand, even if you don’t like the person playing with it? Like,
if your most hated person tried touching it and sucking it, would it stand?
OMG, it would? Yuck, you’re such kadiri creatures talaga!
(Note: This story draft
is based on the tabloid news above. For this set of exercises, I was tasked to
write stories from various points of view.)
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